On the Postponement of Our Founding, Again

It is my privilege to announce that the University of Procrastination will not, this term, be founded. The decision was reached by the Senate after a long and productive meeting, the minutes of which are forthcoming, and reflects our deep and abiding commitment to getting the founding exactly right.

Some will ask how an institution that is not yet founded can hold a Senate, confer degrees, or indeed issue this very announcement. To them we say: precisely. We have found that founding a university is the sort of task best approached slowly, from several angles, and ideally after a short rest. The plaque has been ordered. The date upon it has been left, wisely, blank.

This is not indecision. Indecision is the failure to choose. We have chosen, firmly and repeatedly, to decide later. There is a world of difference, and the whole of our curriculum lives inside it.

We are grateful to our students, staff, and the several accrediting bodies who continue to review our paperwork with such admirable patience. We look forward to founding the University at the earliest moment that does not conflict with anything more pressing, which is to say, in the fullness of time.

Until then, the University remains open, as it has always been, in principle.